Please Behave Yourself Chapter 19
I Have No Idea on How to Face You
Had it not been the fear for her identity exposure, she would have rushed to take the little poor emperor into her arms and console him .
Zhao Yuchen peeked at Bai Qingqing, who was staring at Zhao Rui eagerly . Seeing this, a brilliant idea came to his mind .
“Now that Li Dafa was not responsible, why haven’t you recovered from your illness?” Zhao Yuchen questioned .
Stared at by his father, Zhao Rui felt kind of guilty . Hesitated for a while, he murmured, “I, in order to meet you, deliberately refused to take medicine after being ill and delayed my recovery so that you would be back to visit me . ”
Zhao Rui did all that simply because he pined for his father terribly . He suffered the loss of his mother when he was a baby . For him, his father Zhao Yuchen was the only person to depend on .
But he was told more than once there existed no natural affection in imperial family when the Grand Mentor of the Emperor taught him statecraft .
As an emperor, what he must learned foremost was how to govern the Great Yan Kingdom . Anything other than that, such as natural affection, friendship and love, was as light as floating clouds for him .
The little emperor definitely knew the fact, but he just couldn’t help missing his father .
He remembered when he was very young, his father pampered him a great deal . Back then, his father taught him how to be a qualified emperor, as well as the lesson of life when he encountered frustrations and difficulties .
He knew his father was blind and lost the whole world in sight since he could remember .
Young as he was, he kept it in mind that one day, he would find a highly skilled doctor to cure his father’s eyes, helping him to regain his sight .
However, after he came to the throne, his father moved out from the palace and settled down in the Ink Garden, rendering him barely got the chance to gather with his father all the year round .
Though the seventh emperor of the Great Yan Kingdom he was, he was also a 6-year-old boy who longed for parents’ love and care like all 6-year-olds in the world .
The other day, he suddenly learned from Prime Minister Qin that his father recovered his sight .
He almost jumped for joy and he was eager to get to the Ink Garden post haste to present himself to his beloved father, only to be told by the Grand Eunuch Li that his father sent a message that he was not allowed to leave the palace without permission .
This worried the little emperor so much that he came up with the idea to lure his father’s visit by feigning illness .
Hearing his words, not only Li Dafa and others present were shocked, but also Bai Qingqing . No way did she expect that her baby boy would resort to a ploy of inflicting himself to see his father .
Thinking of it, she plaintively glared at Zhao Yuchen, as if blaming him on the indifference to their son .
Zhao Yuchen was also shocked at his son’s reply .
In fact, Ming Hao indeed reminded him that his baby son wanted his permission to come to the Ink Garden to visit him . But due to the fact that he suffered eye disease and more importantly, that he would recall his late wife on hearing Zhao Rui’s voice, which made him instinctively refuse to see his son .
These years, he deliberately showed indifference to his son merely for fear of that he would mention his mother, to which he had no idea how to reply .
In the entire world, the two persons he felt most reluctant to let down were his wife and his baby son .
However, the two just happened to lead an unhappy life because of him .
Thinking of this, Zhao Yuchen embraced pale-looking Zhao Rui into his arms, saying apologetically, “You silly boy, I know you miss me, but why did you take such measure? Our bodies, to every hair and bit of skin, are received by us from our parents . My heart aches seeing you spoiled yourself like this . ”
Zhao Rui sobbed, “I always thought you dislike me, so I took this way . . . ”
“No, I don’t dislike you, I just . . . ”
Zhao Yuchen embraced his little boy tightly, “I just have no idea how to face you . ”
It was the truth, from his bottom of his heart .
Maybe Zhao Rui didn’t understand, but Bai Qingqing understood what he was implying .
“He did live an unhappy life these years, he blamed himself so muchthat he even didn’t have the confidence to face his own son . ” She figured out finally .
Before entering the palace, she still had resentment to him, but now, she also got influnenced after seeing his sadness and helplessness in front of his son .
Suddenly, old scores and personal grudges accumulate in the past six years’ seemed to have vanished and disappeared at this moment . Only sentimental feelings to fate and resigned emotions on life were left .
Bai Qingqing had always been soft-hearted, so she agreed without hesitation immediately when Zhao Yuchen asked her whether she stay and treat the little emperor .
For her, it had been her dream to stay by her little boy’s side . She would definitely not refuse .
Now that she decided to stay in the palace, Zhao Yuchen wouldn’t be back to the Ink Garden alone .
Knowing his father would stay to accompany him, Zhao Rui couldn’t be happier .
To Zhao Yuchen, though making Bai Qingqing stay was his scheme, he indeed felt guilty to his little boy .
He deemed himself an unqualified father for staying in the Ink Garden for years to escape the world .
But after seeing his baby boy had grown up from a little soft baby into an exquisite-looking boy, he naturally felt happy from the bottom of heart, after all, that was his own son .
What made him most relived was that his son inherited all good features of Su Ruoqing and him . Whenever he saw his boy, the feeling of love rolled up from his heart .
As for Bai Qingqing, he couldn’t figure a proper way to tell his son her identity and relationship between them now .
In general, as a civilian, Bai Qingqing should practice the traditional proprieties of worship on bended knees to the emperor .
But Zhao Yuchen could not have her, who was the mother of the little emperor, kneel down to her son . Therefore, the first thing he had done on returning the palace was announcing to the public that Bai Qingqing was the benefactress of his whole family and she didn’t need to kneel down to anyone when she lived in the palace .
The announcement was not only out of respect to Bai Qingqing, but also a confirmation of how Sacred Emperor’s value her .
Surely, any observant person could see that Sacred Emperor treated that girl specially .
Even Sacred Emperor gave her courtesy treatment, maybe in the near future, chances were she could take the position of Sacred Empress that had been vacant for years .
Afterwards, Bai Qingqing attempted to learn more about the little emperor from Zhao Yuchen .
By no means would Zhao Yuchen reveal this to anyone except Bai Qingqing, after all, what she wanted to know was royal secret history .
But he insisted that Bai Qingqing was Su Ruoqing, so he told her the truth seriously . That year, he was deceived by those villains so that he was angry with his late wife’s alleged betrayal so he lied to her about their son . In fact, he didn’t kill their innocent baby heartlessly .
He lied to Su Ruoqing that he ordered to kill their son merely out of anger .
Bai Qingqing really wanted to beat him up after hearing his explanation .
Hadn’t he lied to her, she couldn’t have committed suicide when she felt desperate back then .
Nevertheless, all these were history . The only thing she could do now was to stay by her baby son’s side as much as possible to make up for her baby who had never enjoyed tender love from his mother .
The news that Zhao Yuchen had been back to the palace was soon leaked to Liu Xiangyi, an imperial concubine of Zhao Yuchen . She was a concubine who married Zhao Yuchen when he was Crown Prince .
When it came to the situation of Zhao Yuchen’s harem when he was in power, only two words could best describe– scarce offspring .
When Zhao Yuchen was still Crown Prince, he showed no interest in those beautiful unmarried girls surrounding him . That meant in the entire world, only Su Ruoqing made him fall in love throughout .
When he forcibly took his brother’s wife to be his own that year, the late Emperor and Empress scolded him seriously for his doing . But Zhao Yuchen was born with persistence in his own ways and he would never stop until he gets what he wanted .
He announced to the public with great fanfare that the only qualified woman to accompany him and spend the whole life with him was Su Ruoqing .
Such a pledge was anomalous, unacceptable, even deemed as treason and heresy for the royal family .
The late Emperor was furious at his seventh son’s doing . At last, they reached a compromise in private that he was allowed to marry Su Ruoqing as the Crown Princess on the condition that he would admit other women to be his concubines .
If in the future there was only one woman in the entire harem of the Great Yan Kingdom, the royal family would descend to laughingstock.